


Your Pulse Reacts

by twinillyrium



Category: The Queen's Gambit (TV)
Genre: Bagels, Because he always bosses her around anyways, Becomes canon divergent, Benny is a brat, Benny is in charge, Beth is in charge, Beth loves it, Beth's pov, But also could be canon compliant if Benny were more self aware, Canon Compliant, Consensual Sex, F/M, Fluff, Missing Scene, Oral Sex, Sex, Sexual Tension, Smut, Sober Beth Harmon, Teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:01:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28022082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twinillyrium/pseuds/twinillyrium
Summary: Beth had imagined sex with Benny on many occasions. He’d touch her shoulder while lecturing over scrambled eggs. Sometimes he’d clap her warmly on the back after she uncovered a flaw in masterclass chess. In those lingering moments she’d plan out the sly things she’d say, the bold things she’d do that would leave him breathless and shaking -- but in none of her predicted scenarios did she imagine it going quite like this.
Relationships: Beth Harmon/Benny Watts
Comments: 34
Kudos: 427





	1. Your Pulse Reacts

“Do you still like my hair?”

_ Oh _ , Beth thought. There was no other interpretation for those words. Even though she had detected the strange looks Benny had been giving her since their final round of speed chess, what he was implying still caught her off guard.

Beth had imagined sex with Benny on many occasions. He’d touch her shoulder while lecturing over scrambled eggs. Sometimes he’d clap her warmly on the back after she uncovered a flaw in masterclass chess. In those lingering moments she’d plan out the sly things she’d say, the bold things she’d do that would leave him breathless and shaking -- but in none of her predicted scenarios did she imagine it going quite like this. 

She looked down at where his hand held her arm, feeling his warm grip on her skin, deciding. She returned her gaze to his face to see him intently studying her, the quirk of a smile appearing on his lips. Beth realized that she had missed her moment to answer while still sounding nonchalant. 

Still, she did her best to appear unfazed. “You made yourself clear when you were more sober than you are now -- no sex.” 

The bluntness of the word hung between them, as she had intended. He wasn’t going to get her into bed with a cute euphemism. And she wanted him to know she didn’t intend to do things halfway. 

“A guy can’t change his mind?” 

A deflection. She could hardly have expected him to make more of an effort here. Her mind moved quickly, deciphering the clues in front of her that would influence her next move. Beth raised her eyebrows for a moment, unamused, trying to keep her face neutral. 

She couldn’t smell the booze on his breath from where they stood, frozen in place. Beth had seen Benny drunk before, or she thought she had, that night in the cafeteria. Was he drunk right now? Playing speed chess against three opponents had regrettably consumed her attention and she had not kept track of how much he had to drink. 

“I’ll have to pass,” Beth said, eyeing him suspiciously. “You’re drunk. You just said so.” 

“I said I wasn’t sober. There’s a difference.” 

Beth pulled her right arm from his grasp and pointed deliberately to the several discarded drinking glasses on the floor.

Benny looked over to where she gestured, then quirked his head in annoyance. “Fine. I’ll prove it. Play me one more time. If I beat you, “ he paused, taking a step toward her and nearly closing the space between them completely, “I get to do whatever I want to you.”

The words sent a sharp chill to the base of her spine. She supposed this new bluntness was contagious. 

“And if I beat you?” 

“Then you get to sleep on the air mattress with your numerous bragging rights and all my cash.” 

“Sounds like a bad deal for me,” Beth retorted, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“It’s actually a great deal for you, you’ll come to find out.”

“You’re sounding awfully confident for someone who just lost all his money playing the very same game you’re now so sure you can win?” 

His eyes were dark, and the smile was gone. “Well, now we’re playing for something I want.” 

***

Benny studied the board, and Beth studied Benny. He hadn’t looked at her in five turns, when he had glanced up to gauge her reaction to a particularly offensive play that was unlike his usual style. The room was silent except for the anxious tap of his bare foot against the concrete floor. It was his move. As they approached the middle game, Beth noted a solid improvement in Benny’s strategy from their last few rounds with his friends present. Maybe he was sobering up after all. 

Benny at last moved his bishop forward, into a position that forced Beth to choose between two pieces to take the fall. Now it was Beth’s turn to focus. 

_ ‘Well, kid... I think you’ve got it’. _ He had said those words less than an hour ago. How could she lose her edge against him after such a thorough string of victories? She felt his eyes on her, and she raised her head to meet his gaze, agitated by his tapping. 

“I thought we were moving on to ‘serious chess _’ _ ? You know this is a cheap play. You don’t have the pieces set up to support this.” 

“Hm, that’s what you think,” he said, looking around the room, as if something more captivating might lay nearby. 

Beth stared down at the board again. “Yeah, in six moves, maybe eight, you’re done.”

Benny spread his legs wide around the board, nearly touching Beth’s knees with those brazenly unclothed feet. “Sounding awfully confident over there,” he said, quoting her words back at her. 

Beth ignored his poor attempt to distract her. She kept her eyes on the board and made her move. Benny countered a moment later. 

Then, Beth saw what she’d missed. A critical place she didn’t defend that would force her to abandon her winning strategy in order to protect her king.  _ Stupid _ . A stupid error. A nervous energy rose within her as she recalled the terms of their bet. She’d wanted to sleep with Benny, they both knew she did, but now that she was confronted with the reality that it might actually happen, right now,  _ tonight _ , she felt uncharacteristically apprehensive. 

No. She could do this. She’d had sex before and it went fine. Sure, those encounters may have been with guys she barely knew and later, a man she had not been particularly attracted to, but she was not the type to get flustered in the face of a challenge. And if nothing else, Benny would certainly be that. 

Beth met his eyes, her mind realigned with steely resolve. He stared back at her, his face unreadable.

“Your move, Beth,” he said quietly. 

Beth drew out the moment. Slowly, deliberately, she leaned over the chess board and raised a hand to touch the side of his face, ultimately moving it up to brush his long hair out of his eyes. Then she heard the clatter of her king against the board. 

“I resign.” 

Benny’s mouth was on hers before she’d fully gotten the words out. His kiss was fierce, hungry, his hands coming up to cradle either side of her head. His tongue invaded her mouth, along with the lingering taste of cheap wine. Beth reciprocated, sinking her hands further through his thick curls, dragging her nails across his scalp. 

Benny abruptly broke the kiss and rose to his knees like a man possessed. “Get up,” he commanded.

Beth rose to her feet shakily and was about to speak before he was after her again, pushing them both back into the doorframe of his bedroom, holding her face to his. Her back hit the wall with a thud, but she didn’t feel it. Her body was on fire. Was she sweating? She pawed uselessly at his back, arching her body into his.

He pulled them both into his room, and roughly began pulling at the hem of her shirt.

Needing to keep up, Beth fumbled with his belt but made no progress before he took a step back, both of them out of breath. “Not our agreement,” he said, a hand out in front of him to stop her advancing. 

“So what,” she said, trying to regain her composure but finding only stale air where her willpower used to be, “I just stand here and let you have your way with me?” 

“And you follow my directions,” he said, offering a smile between breaths. His hands expertly removed the belt and discarded it to the floor behind him. 

So here was the great Benny Watts, once again bossing her around. Before she could manage to scoff at his comment he was in her space again, kissing her deeply. Some of his insatiable urgency had been replaced with a slower passion, like the inevitable pull of the ocean’s undertow as compared to the violent tidal wave she had just endured. 

“Sorry,” he said after a moment, resting his forehead on hers. “Tell me to stop if it’s too much. I can get carried away. I just --”

She silenced him with a kiss. Through her hazy mind, she considered the person in front of her. She knew that beneath his carefully crafted persona was a man not so different from herself. A kid who was forced to bear the burden of talent too young, but desperate to overcome all those grand expectations. 

“Then let’s get carried away,” Beth said into his ear, trying to coat her voice with lust like the great femme fatales of the movies she loved. “Your move, Benny.” 

Within moments Beth’s shirt along with Benny’s joined his belt on the floor. They dragged nails over new skin, Benny scaling his hands up her sides, but falling short of touching her chest. Beth took his hand and pushed it into her front, and Benny didn’t need additional instruction. His hands moved in a way that allowed him to seemingly reach down to her very core, permeating through to where he had not yet explored. Beth assisted by unclasping her lace bra with a brief angling of her arms, letting it fall away onto their growing pile of clothes. His dark eyes ran over her in a moment, his gaze boring into her. She’d never felt so exposed in her life. She wondered whether her whole body was flushed red. 

Benny placed his hands on her shoulders before pushing her roughly onto his mattress.

Beth let out a yelp of surprise and scrambled to sit up on her elbows, aware now that her bare chest was on full display.

“Stay,” Benny said, sinking to his knees in front of her at the edge of the bed, his eyes taking in her form with no attempt to hide it. Another jolt of warmth emanated from the center of her body at his tone as she waited. He leaned over her to place his hands to her hips, his weight momentarily holding her down. 

Benny undid the buttons of her pants and slid them off her legs. He began caressing her thighs with light touches, his mouth coming down to kiss hungrily in their path. Beth was finding it hard to breathe, hard to see anything except the darkness of his gaze looking up at her -- two black holes without consideration or remorse intent on pulling her in. She needed to be closer to him. As if reading her mind, he crawled over her, smothering her mouth with his when he reached her face.

“You’re so goddamn beautiful,” he said, between deep kisses and sharp bites of his teeth. “You have no right to be this beautiful and that good at chess.”

Beth let out a short laugh into his mouth, moving her hands along his bare back. She was trying to pull him down to her and struggling to move his pants out of her way at the same time. 

Benny slid a hand down to the waistband of her underwear, seeming to memorize the contours of her body as he went. Beth let out a shaky gasp but didn’t know where it came from. He hadn’t even touched her there yet. With three fingers under the elastic, he suddenly stopped and looked up at her, assessing. 

“May I?” he asked. 

Beth huffed out a high-pitched noise that must have sounded enough like “yes” for him to continue. Moving his hand underneath the fabric, Beth’s hips jerked forward at the electric contact. Fingers pushed inside her in the next moment. 

Beth screwed her eyes shut at the sensation, a small sound escaping from her throat. Her face relaxed as she began to raise her hips into his warm touch. His fingers met no resistance and boldly continued their exploration. 

“Glad you’re enjoying this as much as I am,” Benny said in a strained, low voice. 

Two fingers pulsed in and out of her with agonizing slowness, occasionally curling inward in a way that made her stomach muscles clench tight. Then, his thumb found the small bundle of nerves that pulled another sound from her lips. Pushing here and there, he stroked her delicately, testing her response. Benny shifted over her again and swallowed her moans with his mouth, his teeth grazing her bottom lip. 

“Benny, please,” Beth said, turning away from his face for a gulp of air. Her nails raked down his back, trying desperately to convey what her words could not. 

Benny had moved down to her neck, kissing and sucking gently, huffs of warm air from his ragged breathing creating goosebumps on her flesh.

“Hmm?” he murmured into her ear. 

Her hands pulled to no effect on his remaining clothing within her reach. “I need … I need,” Beth stammered.

“Alright, alright...” Benny said, sitting up and reallocating his torturous hands to the button and fly of his jeans. “Just figuring out what makes you tick, kid.” 

Beth raised herself to her elbows, grateful for a second’s relief to regain some semblance of self-control. Benny discarded his pants leaving on only his underwear, and returned to his place kneeling over her. 

“And what makes you tick, Benny?” Beth asked, reaching up to feel the shape of him over his boxers. He leaned into her touch for only a moment before gently restraining her wrist. 

“Next time,” he said, a low authority in his voice, “we’ll do it your way. This time, we’re doing it my way.” 

Those were the terms of the bet, after all. Without fanfare, Benny reached forward to tug her underwear free from her body, with all the sensuality of yanking the shower curtain closed before a bath. 

Bemused, Beth stayed quiet but caressed the back of his leg with her foot, running it slowly up towards his backside. 

“Turn over.” 

Beth’s foot dropped back to the bed as she stared up at him, utterly confused. What? The nervousness was back, her heart speeding up. What was he planning to do? Her body seemed to be preparing her for some physical feat that she couldn’t organize her mind or body to act on. She didn’t move. 

Benny sensed her hesitation and looked off around the room with a nod of his head. “Nothing kinky. Look, I’m still going…” he leaned down and sunk his middle finger back inside her for emphasis. “...In here.” 

Beth’s face felt hot, in fact her entire body seemed to be uncontrollably radiating heat. What had she been doing with her legs? 

Benny withdrew his finger and met her eyes with his own. Her move. What he was proposing was foreign to her... her mind tried to sort out the logistics but was coming up short with every replay of the scenario. Still not fully in control of her limbs, she began to rearrange herself onto her stomach, getting one last look at Benny’s lopsided smile before she turned away. 

“Don’t make me regret this,” Beth warned, forcing more confidence behind her words than she possessed. She laid her head on a lumpy pillow. 

“That’s the spirit,” Benny said. Beth felt him begin to lay his body over hers and nuzzle his face into her neck once more. Beth relaxed into his body, closing her eyes. He brushed her hair aside and sucked on a sensitive place below her ear, drawing out another moan that reverberated into the bed. 

Beth, finally receiving the contact she craved, arched against him, feeling his hardness pressed into her back. Parts of her seemed to vibrate. Her stomach was in knots, her shoulders clenching and unclenching, longing for pressure further down. Unable to reach him, Beth fisted her hands into his scratchy sheets. She could hear Benny’s uneven breathing into her neck. 

And then, Benny was gone. The bed creaked loudly as he moved off of it completely. Beth felt a rush of cool air against her flesh, followed by a tingling shiver that ran from head to foot. Beth let out a whine of frustration, craving that warm, enveloping weight of his body again. She thought she saw Benny rummaging in the bedside table, but her mind was no longer forming coherent thoughts beyond  _ want, want, want _ . She writhed into his bed and must have been making some truly pitiful noises, desperate for his return.

Beth heard a distinct rustle of plastic. Then, Benny rejoined her, running his hands along the backs of her thighs. He lingered there a moment before moving on his hands and knees to her head, careful to avoid putting his weight on her this time. 

“Spread your legs,” Benny muttered into her ear.

Beth’s brilliant mind was not able to conjure a verbal response. In an ungraceful set of motions, Beth extended herself across the bed. 

Benny settled back between her knees, and placed a hand on her hip. Beth didn’t realize she was holding her breath, unable to see his face from her current position to gauge his next move. 

Beth felt a kiss at the base of her spine. Then, Benny was guiding himself into her, the unmistakable push at her entrance trapping a groan in her throat. He rocked forward in small strokes until he was fully inside, letting out a sound somewhere between a grunt and a hum as he went. His grip on her waist might have been painful if she could focus on anything beyond the delicious stretch around him. The angle from this position allowed Benny to press deeper than what Beth had ever experienced. 

Benny began to thrust in earnest, driving her a half inch up the bed each time he sunk himself down. Beth finally found purchase with her knees, allowing her to raise herself slightly to meet his thrusts. There was no discomfort this time, only a magnificent feeling of fullness. Beth bowed her head and closed her eyes, letting herself become overwhelmed by the sensation. Her breathing took the form of quick, stuttering gasps. But they exhaled together, echoing each other’s exertions as their bodies collided, a magnetic force drawing them together like tectonic plates in the earth. 

Benny evened out his brutal pace to snake a hand over her hip and down to her center. Beth let out a hiss through her teeth when she felt the caress of his fingers, her body now struggling to press into where they connected both above and below her.

“That’s it, that’s it,” Benny muttered, stroking her in time with their movements. 

The mounting pressure within her threatened to snap with each flick of his wrist; a high-tension wire doomed to break. Beth impulsively reached down to trap his hand against her in a vice-like grip, her nails digging into his skin. Benny took the hint and continued his expert ministrations. All the while, he was plunging into her with deep, long strokes. His breathing was as erratic as her own. 

In a matter of seconds it was all too much. The precarious wire within her snapped without warning, causing a surge of pure pleasure to radiate from her core. Writhing into his hand, Beth cried out helplessly into the pillow. Wave after wave passed over her, and Benny slowed his pace to help her through it. For a moment, she was weightless. Her mind was blissfully blank as the swells passed. The way he moved inside her when he leaned in to kiss her face left her trembling. 

Benny reclaimed his hand from under her and moved it to her shoulder, holding her steady with his strength. He thrust hard only a few times more before she felt his hips stutter against her, accompanied by a short groan that drowned out the squeaking sound of the bed. Beth, who had not remained quiet during this time, arched her back into him for those last few moments of fullness. 

There was a long silence as they both fought for breath. Benny’s hand moved from its bruising place on her shoulder to rest atop one of her own, threading his fingers through hers and squeezing tight. He rearranged their bodies to where they could lay boneless side by side. Some dim part of Beth’s mind remarked that they were holding hands for the first time.

“Hm,” Benny mused in a curious tone, as if cataloguing what he had just learned about a particularly difficult opponent. 

As Beth came back to her senses, she contemplated what had just transpired between herself and Benny Watts. Unlike some of her previous encounters, there was no embarrassment -- no self-conscious thoughts nagging at the fringes of her mind. She disentangled herself from Benny and rolled over to the right side of his bed, stretching out her limbs and making herself comfortable for the night. Benny settled in with an arm around her waist. 

“ _ That’s _ what it’s supposed to feel like.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! I'm a latecomer to this series but I've been devouring all the fanfics you guys have been creating for it. I wanted to write something a little different, with Benny mostly taking the lead and having things his way, because we all know he's a brat.
> 
> Please let me know if there is interest for a chapter 2! I'd like to give Beth a chance to retaliate. Comments and feedback are greatly appreciated!


	2. You Know Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth takes her revenge!

Beth woke up before it was fully light out, not that it made much difference in Benny’s subterranean apartment. It took her a moment to place where she was… what bed she was in, and why there was a warm arm pushed up against her side. Memories of the events of the previous night startled Beth into consciousness. Right. She and Benny had had sex. And then he’d ruined the mood by spouting nonsense that she already knew. 

Throwing back the covers, Beth’s feet met the cluttered floor. She detected a pleasant soreness as she moved, stretching her arms above her head before standing. Benny remained asleep. His limbs were cast in every direction, with a muffled snore emanating with each intake of breath. 

Beth turned on the shower taps to get the water warm before using the toilet itself; the dull rattling of the pipes in the ceiling no longer unsettling her like they used to. She dressed in a skirt with a hair scarf and made herself a pot of coffee. As she moved around the kitchen she did not take much care to avoid disturbing the sleeping man in the next room. 

The normal whirring and hum of another New York City morning seemed to only heighten the silence around Beth. She sat at the gloomy kitchen table, re-reading _The Art of the Middlegame_ by Alexander Kotov. As hard as she tried to concentrate on the tactics proposed in the early chapters, Benny crept into her mind like an annoying jingle from the radio. ‘ _You should play the Sicilian’_. Really? That was his most pressing comment after what they got up to last night? And what’s worse -- even after she had basically spelled out why she was upset, he still didn’t get it. Beth scooted her chair backwards on the floor out of irritation, sending a sharp clap of sound through the stillness. She forced her attention back to her book. 

Benny lumbered out of his bedroom a few minutes later, clothed only in a pair of blue boxers set low on his hips. He squinted his eyes against the sunlight now streaming through his dirty half-windows, holding a hand up in front of his face before noticing Beth at the table. 

“You’re up early,” he said, making a beeline towards the coffee, but finding only an empty pot. “Didn’t save any for me?”

Beth flipped a page and didn’t look up.

“What, now you’re not talking to me?”

With a long sigh Beth turned her attention to Benny, leveling a flat stare at him through her brows. “Oh, I didn’t realize we were doing non-chess-related conversation.” 

Benny hung his head with a groan, annoyed. “Is this about last night?” 

“You tell me, Benny. Got any other enlightening tournament tips you just can’t wait to share?”

“Ugh, I knew this was a bad idea,” he said, running a hand through his disheveled hair and making his way back to his room. 

“Well, I guess you were right again,” Beth snapped, taking a sip of her fresh coffee and returning to her book. 

Benny disappeared behind her, only to re-emerge a second later.

“Come with me to get breakfast?” 

Beth turned in her seat and shot him a glare, but Benny’s expression as he leaned on the doorframe surprised her. She had seen that look before -- from the end of their first championship match in Las Vegas. She saw someone who knew they’d damaged something delicate and needed to make amends. ‘ _Tough game’_. Beth saw in his eyes that his slight against her last evening had been accidental, but he knew he was at fault. 

Beth rolled her eyes and looked over to the near-empty refrigerator. “Fine.” 

***

Benny and Beth were met with bemused stares and the occasional disapproving scoff by fellow New Yorkers as they walked northward on 9th avenue. Benny didn’t seem to notice. Beth suspected her companion’s unusual attire brought on the attention. Of course, he’d donned his fedora and long leather jacket despite the unseasonably warm fall day. Beth was surprised he didn’t sweat through it. 

Benny kept a step or two ahead of her, pointing out his favorite bars and restaurants, or the occasional landmark. The conversation was one-sided as usual, but Benny seemed to be making more of an attempt to solicit her feedback. His glances back to her prompted polite responses such as “looks nice” or “I’ll have to check that out”. 

After ten minutes at Benny’s brutal pace, Beth began to wonder why she was tolerating his uncomfortable walking speed at all. They’d scarcely left Benny’s apartment together in the three weeks she’d been in New York -- usually one of them would dash out for groceries alone leaving the other to tend to Benny’s curriculum. Beth should have suspected that he’d be a fast walker. In his mind, speed was always an enhancement. 

Benny eventually noticed that Beth was lagging behind when she’d missed the light at an intersection. He stopped and waited for her to cross. He looked like he wanted to inquire why she wasn’t keeping up, but then decided to keep his words to himself. 

“Why don’t you walk next to me like a normal person?” Beth said, answering his unasked question. 

“Fair enough,” Benny replied, smoothly adopting her pace and shoving his hands into his pockets. 

“And how much farther is breakfast? I wouldn’t have agreed to come along if I knew this was going to be such an undertaking,” Beth said, glancing down at her sore heels which were beginning to blister in her shoes. 

“It’s about five more blocks. It’s good, I promise,” Benny assured her. But he was looking at her feet as well. “Not really worth the cab fare at this point,” he shrugged. 

Beth shot him a look that was beginning to frequent their interactions -- part disapproval, part resigned frustration, which usually included rolling her eyes. 

Benny opened his mouth for a long moment before continuing with an unexpected question. 

“So what was your life like growing up?”

Beth only looked at him, confused.

Benny turned his eyes forward and continued. “I know you were in an orphanage until you were 15, and after that you lived in a _nice suburban Kentucky home_. But humor me. Siblings? Friends? Pets?” 

Beth detected an underlying tone of mockery that made her immediately defensive. 

“I’m surprised you don’t know, given how much you like to pour over my interviews,” Beth retorted. 

“Well, I apologize if it sounded like I was trying to interview you,” Benny said.

That time, he sounded genuine. Now Beth was even more confused. 

“Give me a break Beth, I’m trying to get to know you,” Benny conceded, after her sustained silence. 

_Aha_. So this was his way of apologizing for last night. By trying -- and currently failing -- to have a conversation with her that was not about chess. 

Beth crossed her arms and stared at her feet as they walked. “I don’t really like to think about my past,” she admitted quietly. 

“Well, I’m an open book,” Benny said, not missing a beat. “Born and raised in New Hampshire. My uncle bought me a chess set when I was five and it was pure magic from the moment I won my first game. Had a brittany spaniel growing up named Ava. Two sisters, one brother. Most of them still live around Manchester.” 

“New Hampshire? Isn’t that way up north?” Beth asked. “Then what’s with the hat?” 

“Have you seen this hat on me? I may not be from the wild west but that doesn’t mean I don’t rock the look.” He shot her a grin and winked. 

Beth smiled too despite her attempt to hide it. 

“The federation liked it,” Benny continued. “Said it made me look like a “real American” in my photos with the competition. After that, it just stuck. Don’t feel like myself without it.”

Beth reconsidered his outfit. “It does look good on you, Benny,” Beth assured him, putting a fair amount of sarcasm into her tone. 

“I know it does, but thank you.” 

By the time they reached their destination, Beth’s annoyance with Benny had almost completely melted away.

Benny held open the door of a local bakery near Central Park. “After you,” he said, with a tip of that ridiculous hat. 

Beth suppressed a smirk but gave him a curt nod as she passed. She approached the counter and Benny stepped up beside her.

“You ever had a real New York bagel?”

“I can’t say that I have,” Beth said, eyeing the fresh breads and pastries on display. The inviting aroma of fresh yeast was making her mouth water. 

“Well, you’re in for a treat.”

Benny ordered two sesame bagels and a hot coffee for himself, shooing Beth away when she offered him some change to help pay. 

Bagels in hand, the two chess masters left the bakery to cross the street into Central Park. 

“You just can’t get something like this anywhere else,” Benny concluded, admiring the craftsmanship of his food as he leaned in for another bite.

He’d applied cream cheese at least an inch thick. Some of it had already made a home in his mustache. 

“I’m sure that’s true,” Beth replied, amused.

She was enjoying her bagel, actually. It was like toast, only fluffier, and the cream cheese added a richness that just wasn’t comparable to butter. It tasted delicious, even if she was hyper aware of the cream cheese sticking to her teeth. 

“Ah, here we are,” Benny said as they rounded a corner within the meandering park. “I thought we could apply what we went over in the Petrosian games here, since it’s such a nice day.”

Before them stood an octagonal building with stone tables and benches scattered around a round, fenced-in area. The tables, Beth saw, each featured a weathered chess board made up of squares of black paint. She was reminded of the board on her ceiling at Methuen, the imaginary one where she had first learned to play.

Pairs of men and women studied the boards, while others simply munched their own bagels and coffee together. Beth immediately zeroed in on a game of chess being played by two older gentlemen wearing patterned trilby hats. 

“I’ll be right back, they have pieces to rent inside,” Benny said, moving towards the little building in the center of the pavilion. 

Beth nodded, still looking at the game played by the men a few feet away. She took a cautious step toward them, unable to stop herself from getting a closer look. 

“You’re welcome to observe, my dear,” said the fair-haired man sitting on the left. “As you can see, I’m in quite a bind.”

Beth scanned the board. Black was playing the Classical Scotch, but had evidently made a few blunders after the opening. White had its remaining pieces developed well and was in a position to win the game soon. 

His opponent, a dark-skinned man playing the white side of the board, spoke next. “I’ve got him on the ropes. But please, help him if you can. He’s lost our first three matches this morning already!” 

The fair-haired man playing black hung his head, but was still smiling. “That’s because you cheat!”

They laughed, and Beth did too. She noticed they were waiting for her to either say something, or possibly to excuse herself and let them carry on. Right -- this wasn’t a competition where players were used to being observed.

“I do have a suggestion,” Beth said carefully. There were a few rudimentary actions black could take to win, even with his current disadvantage. 

“Please, share!” pled the man on the left, as he made a motion to welcome her closer to the board. 

Without touching the pieces, Beth began to explain the moves and countermoves both sides would make, ultimately ending in a victory for black. After rambling for a few moments, she found the dark-skinned man staring at her curiously. 

“Well, I’ll be damned. I knew you looked familiar. You’re that chess champion. Harmon… Beth Harmon?” 

“Yes, that’s me,” she said, nervously tucking her hair behind her ear. Beth was rarely recognized outside the hotels where tournaments were held, and even there she still was not used to it. She looked down, embarrassed to be holding a half-eaten bagel and used napkins in her left hand. Additionally, since she began training with Benny, she had stopped curling her hair or wearing much makeup at all. She should have been flattered, but she only felt self-conscious instead. 

At that moment, Benny reappeared at her side. “Got the pieces. Showing off?” he said to her, gesturing to the game in limbo, then to the grins sported by both men playing. 

“And Benny Watts!” shouted the man on the left. He stood up with his hand extended. “My goodness, what a treat it is to meet you both! We’re huge fans!”

Benny confidently stepped forward to shake the man’s hand. “Thank you, sir. Looks like you already found the best player here, Beth just became the US champion this month.”

“Yes of course, congratulations!” he said, turning his attention back to Beth. “My wife will never believe this. Damn, I wish I had a camera… could we please have your autographs?” He offered her a pen from his jacket.

Beth awkwardly scribbled her name onto a napkin while Benny schmoozed with the chess players, casually leaning his foot on the bench as he held court. By this point, other players at neighboring tables had started to eavesdrop on the loud conversation, a couple of them getting to their feet to join in. The hat and trenchcoat were certainly doing the trick. 

Beth offered to find her and Benny their own table while the men talked excitedly, taking the bag of chess pieces from Benny’s hand. She walked across the pavilion to a table shaded by a large oak tree, the pain from her blistering heel making her wince. None of the other patrons in the area paid her attention when she sat down. She looked over at Benny, completely in his element -- the two older men hanging on his every word. Benny Watts, the face of American chess. Charming, captivating, and beloved. And here she was, the new US champion, who had proved herself to be the superior player both publicly and privately. So why did she feel so hopelessly inadequate?

After a long few minutes, Beth saw Benny excuse himself from his dozen fans and make his way over to her table. The crowd dispersed somewhat, but several pairs of eyes followed him to her table.

“Sorry,” Benny said, sitting down across from her. “After that whooping you gave me last night, I needed the ego boost.” 

Beth smiled. “They love you. I thought that one guy was going to go buy a camera just for a picture with you.” 

“They love you too. They were asking about you. You could have stayed to talk with them,” Benny said, folding his hands on the table, his way of inviting her to make the first move. 

Beth sighed, straightening the pieces she’d set up in front of them. “I can’t do what you do. I don’t know how to just... talk with strangers.” 

Benny shrugged, as if there were nothing to it. “Just talk about chess! I was telling them about our match in Ohio. Gave a few details they didn’t put in the papers,” he added, arching an eyebrow. 

Beth felt her face flush red. “They better not think that I’m staying with you.”

“I told them I’m training you for a tournament in Paris, which is the truth,” he said flatly, his expression hardening.

Beth moved her pawn forward, returning a cold look of her own. “The federation won’t look too kindly on us living in sin,” she said quietly, making sure no one could overhear.

“Aha, good to know you’re not embarrassed to be seen with me,” Benny replied, moving his queen knight left. 

“I’m not,” Beth said simply. She looked up to find him smiling at her. Her mouth twitched upward, unable to disregard the onlookers still scattered around the pavilion. 

The pair fell into silence for the duration of their first game. On two occasions, men approached their table and attempted to make conversation. Benny kindly asked them both for privacy while they practiced. After two creative losses, Benny discarded his hat and coat on the bench behind him, finally succumbing to the heat of the midday sun. The novelty had worn off, and Beth noted that they were once again anonymous.

“People only want to talk to me about chess so… that’s what I do,” Benny said suddenly, breaking their amicable silence. 

Beth looked up at him, considering his words. But before she could reply, he stammered on. 

“I show up to tournaments that I haven’t even entered just to have the opportunity to talk to people who understand chess. And having you here, after what we did last night I just... fell back on what I knew best. I’m sorry if it sounded like I didn’t… care,” he finished lamely, finally facing her properly. His face was soft, earnest. 

Beth glanced around at the neighboring tables, making sure no one was looking in their direction. Surprising herself as much as Benny, she reached across the table to take his hand in hers. She looked at their entwined fingers for a long moment before speaking.

“Thanks. Thanks for saying that,” she affirmed, not quite able to meet his eyes. “Last night I sort of felt like a project or a... problem for you to solve. I thought we might have made a mistake.”

“You think I do this a lot? Have pretty girls stay with me and teach them chess? You may have guessed from the state of my apartment, but you’re the first.” 

Beth felt herself smile, finally looking up at him. “Yeah, you really need to do something about your place.” 

Benny nodded in agreement. “Well, someone took the first place winnings I was counting on, so you owe me a sofa.” 

Beth laughed at that, now stroking the back of his metallic ring with her thumb. With his free hand, Benny knocked over his king. “I think we showed these pieces a good time. Let’s get a cab ride home, your treat.” 

***

The two chessmasters had a quiet evening in. Occasionally they’d talk through an interesting strategy from a tournament record of games, but mostly they kept to themselves. They had beans on toast for dinner, and Beth found herself wondering whether she could venture out for another bagel in the morning. 

As it neared their usual bedtime, Beth felt herself getting anxious again. She was finding it hard to concentrate on her book, and kept stealing glances at Benny, who was setting up an endgame at the kitchen table. They’d had a lovely day together. Quite honestly, Beth hadn’t felt this close to someone since her late mother, Alma. She didn’t want to presume that she was invited to sleep in the bedroom, but she didn’t directly want to ask, either.

Eventually, after a long sigh, Benny rose from the kitchen table and walked to his bedroom, as he had done so many nights before. It was usually her cue to use the bathroom and start pumping up the mattress. He looked back at Beth, his eyebrows raised. 

“Care to join me?” 

“If you want. I mean... I can also sleep out here if you’d prefer,” Beth faltered, trying to keep her face passive. 

Benny rolled his eyes and held the door open. “Yes, I want you to sleep in here. It’s your turn.” 

Her turn… did that mean _he_ intended to use the air mattress? 

Noting her confusion, Benny crossed the room and put his hands on either side of the worn leather chair she was sitting in, bringing his face in close to hers. “It’s your turn to do whatever you want to me. Remember?” 

Beth felt her breath catch in her throat. Benny didn’t come any closer, and instead retreated back into the doorframe with an angling of his head, waiting for her. 

Without a clue as to how she would proceed, Beth got to her feet and followed him into the bedroom, legs stiff. Her mind was suddenly blank as to how this had worked in the past. Why did she feel so nervous all over again? 

“So, where do you want me?” Benny asked, smiling. He put his hands on his hips and struck a pose with his leg out. Confident as ever.

Beth laughed, but didn’t move toward him. For a moment, they only looked at each other, Benny clearly waiting for Beth to initiate.

“We don’t have to do this, you know,” Benny said at last, breaking the awkward silence. “I don’t want you to feel pressured into anything.” 

Beth didn’t like the way he was studying her, concern on his face. 

“I do, I do want this,“ Beth rushed out. She closed her eyes to organize her thoughts and took a steadying breath. “I haven’t done this much,” she added. She needed him to understand.

She’d always tried to keep this fact a secret from her partners. She thought eventually, she’d have sex all figured out, and she wouldn’t feel so inexperienced anymore. But Benny was just standing there, expecting her to do something she didn’t know how to do.

“But you’ve done this… more than once?” Benny asked carefully. His demeanor changed. No longer was he standing before her like an opponent seeking a challenge. His posture had softened. 

“Yes,” Beth asserted, aware of what he was asking. Her fingers absent-mindedly tucked her hair behind her ears. “But never more than once with the same person,” she mumbled, not quite sure she wanted him to hear.

“Well, I’m honored to be worth a second shot,” Benny said, a smile returning to his lips as he looked her over. 

“So, to summarize, you _do_ want to sleep with me, but you don’t know where to start. That about right?” he said with eyebrows raised.

Beth nodded, trying to keep herself from fidgeting. 

“Then, what happens if I do this...”

Benny navigated across the small space in his bedroom and took her face in his hands. Her body tensed at his proximity, all of her nerve endings suddenly on high alert. Compassionate eyes bore into her for a long moment, as if he were seeing her clearly for the first time. His gaze settled on her mouth. It was the same way he’d looked at her last night, his eyes dark with hunger and purpose. 

Beth stared back, wordless, entranced. She felt the pulse of each thundering heartbeat as she waited for the inevitable. Then, when he was satisfied that all the air had gone out of the room, he brought his lips in to meet hers.

The kiss was soft, tentative, with just the slightest amount of pressure. Beth wasn’t sure she would recognize the man touching her as Benny if her senses weren’t otherwise flooded with him. She breathed him in, filling her nose with the smell of citrus and Earl Grey tea.

‘ _Your turn_.’ She deepened the kiss, opening her mouth with an angling of her head. She leaned into him and brought her hands up to his back to keep him pinned to her. They stumbled a step backward due to the shift in balance, but Benny caught them with a sturdy hand on the wall. She dared to run her tongue along his bottom lip, intoxicated by his taste.

It wasn’t enough. Beth broke the kiss, stepping back from him to lay out her demands.

“Get undressed,” she said, pointing a finger to the floor where he stood. _Now_.

Benny’s answering smile was positively wicked. He quickly reached to discard his shirt, followed by his trousers. Beth watched him move, trying not to look too pleased with herself. She felt desired, powerful, and in-control. What to make him do next?

Within seconds Benny was down to his boxers. He hesitated, looking back to her for instruction. With a chiding roll of her eyes, she decided to take pity on him and even the game.

“Help me out of this?” she suggested, making a show of pointing to the zipper on her tight skirt.

Benny’s eyes trailed down her body as he moved to stand behind her. His hands came to rest on the hem of her skirt, his thumbs brushing the bare skin of her lower back. Beth felt goosebumps ripple across her flesh but she resisted the urge to lean into him. At last Benny succeeded with the zipper, and held out his hand to help her step out of it. 

Beth didn’t turn to face him, instead tugging at the neck of her sweater and leaning her head to the side. “And this?”

Benny found the bottom of her shirt and pulled it over her head. Beth nearly laughed -- the man was nothing if not efficient. Now clothed in only her bra and underwear, Beth was exposed to the chilly apartment. Warm hands graced her shoulders, fingers trailing down towards her collarbone, then moving back up to delicately find their way under a bra strap. 

“And this?” he mumbled into her hair. 

“Yes, that too,” she breathed, trying to keep her voice steady. 

Benny slipped the straps over her shoulders. He set to work on undoing the clasps while burying his face in the crook of her neck, his mustache tickling her skin. Beth let out a moan, moving her head to give him better access. 

Lace slipped down her body and hands instantly replaced where it had been. He groped her hungrily, his breathing becoming increasingly ragged in her ear. Beth raised an arm to tangle her fingers in his hair. An electric buzz emerged under her skin where his hands had been -- static interrupting the regularly scheduled programming of her mind. Beth needed to regain the upper hand before he overwhelmed her completely. 

Brief flashes of the nights she spent with Tim and Harry flickered through her mind. How her inexperience resulted in them stepping up to choreograph the encounter, leaving her feeling awkward and unsatisfied. But here with Benny, her equal, she could experiment however she saw fit. He’d shown her as much just last night. 

Summoning her determination, she pried his hands off of her and turned around to face him. Benny’s eyes were positively feral, animalistic, and she was currently denying him what he wanted. Beth circled him, looking him over. His eyes stalked her movements but he didn’t say a word. She leveled a hand on his chest and pushed, forcing him to take steps backwards till his calves hit the bed.

“Make yourself comfortable,” Beth said.

Benny sunk down onto his mattress, crawling to the center on the palms of his hands. He settled with his head propped up by one arm on his headboard, watching her. Beth noted an unmistakable bulge in his boxers and smirked. She leaned down to advance after him, letting him enjoy the view as she moved. The places where bare skin grazed skin burned hot. 

“I’ve been meaning to try something,” she said, reaching her destination over him, her knees resting outside his. To show him what she meant, she boldly placed her hand over the bulge in his underwear, tracing its shape. She glanced up for his reaction. 

“Be my guest,” Benny managed to get out. His voice no longer resembled the charismatic orator she knew him to be. 

Beth moved her fingers to the hem of his boxers. Matter of factly, as if taking a rook from an unchallenging opponent, she didn’t waste time pulling them down his legs. 

His erection sprang free. Her first thought was how odd it looked, how almost alien. It occurred to her that she had never really gotten a good look at one of these up close in the past. 

“By all means, drink me in,” Benny said, gesturing to himself vaguely with the free hand not supporting his head. 

Beth had to let out a short laugh. Though his confidence spilled into the arena of arrogance on occasion, she had to admit that it was very attractive in bed. 

“Oh I plan to,” she shot back. Benny’s almond eyes flashed, like a shark in water, lying in wait. 

Having delayed enough, she gripped the base of him. She considered the weight in her hand, gliding her wrist up and down slowly, fascinated. It was somehow hard and soft at the same time. Beth heard Benny’s breathing change again. 

_‘Now or never’_. She met his eyes as she slowly, experimentally, lowered her mouth over the head. It tasted salty and sour, like a poorly made drink. While it wasn’t entirely pleasant, she was intrigued enough to continue. She took more of him, sucking slightly. Was this right? 

After a moment’s hesitation, Benny shifted his hips. He raised them almost imperceptibly and brought them back down to the bed just as slow. Hmm. Beth mimicked the motion with her mouth, eliciting a sharp rush of air from the man beneath her. Ever the quick study, Beth began to bob her head, occasionally tonguing the tip for a delicious groan from Benny. She wrapped one hand around the base and the other on his thigh for better leverage. The muscles of his stomach went taut under his skin. She could do this. She ventured so far as to think she was doing it well.

“Ah -- Beth, if you keep this up…” Benny said between quick breaths. He didn’t finish the thought, but his warning was clear enough. 

Beth moved her mouth off of him and looked up, thoroughly enjoying the desperate expression on his face. But she wasn’t done with him yet. He was staring at her through half-lidded and pitch-black eyes. Beth saw him flex his wrist impatiently but he made no attempt to move toward her. 

“Just seeing what makes you tick,” she mused, trying to appear completely calm and composed as she peered at him through her lashes. 

In truth, she felt each throb of her racing heart echoing straight down to her core. The sight of Benny naked and panting below her sent a fresh surge of wetness between her legs. Right. No more playing around. 

Benny readjusted himself against the headboard as she attempted to deftly remove her underwear. It got caught on her left foot, but she managed to catch herself before she gracelessly flopped forward on the bed. She shot a look at Benny, daring him to laugh. He was still watching her, clearly trying to fight back a smile. He said nothing. 

“Don’t laugh at me,” Beth warned with a stern look. She slithered back to her former position kneeling over his narrow frame.

“I wouldn’t dare,” Benny said, running his eyes up her body. 

His hair was unkempt and there was a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead, but somehow he still looked so relaxed, as if this were a frequently occurring situation. _Maybe it could be_ , she thought. 

“I had another idea,” Beth purred. 

She was finding she liked being in charge. Now that she had learned how each of the pieces moved, she wanted to dominate the game. She wanted to _win_. 

“Can’t wait to hear it,” Benny replied. 

Beth shuffled forward over him in response, lowering her hips just enough to feel the tip of him slide against her. Benny was not keeping still, desperate for more contact, but Beth had to give him credit for keeping his hands to himself. She straightened up off of him, not giving in to what he wanted, even while her own body screamed for it too. He looked up at her with furrowed brows, a questioning look mixed with frustration on his face. 

“Forgetting something?” she said. 

His face went blank, followed by a dawning recognition before he ran a hand over his eyes. She had him distracted. Were this a chess match, she would win with ease. 

“Bottom drawer,” he rushed out, pointing off to the side of his bed. 

Beth leaned over to the small table where he had acquired the condom last night. Her chest pressed up against him perhaps more than necessary. She felt around blindly until at last she found what she needed. She held the small square package up to her face to find the notch in the dim light. 

“Need help?” Benny offered.

“I got it,” Beth said. 

This was something else she needed to learn how to do. After some fumbling, she at last tore open the package and removed the moist, circular ring. She rolled it over him, using the moment to run a hand along his thighs, stroking him tenderly as she worked. Benny let out a long-held breath, twitching under her. 

“I was _not_ this cruel to you last night,” Benny groaned, closing his eyes and shaking his head. He was still impossibly hard in her hand. 

Beth smirked at that. “Maybe not,” she teased. 

And maybe it was time to be nice. So she placed her hands on his shoulders and leaned over Benny, waiting for him to meet her eyes. When he did, his mouth parted slightly, his features warped by dark desire and lust. Beth kissed him then, slowly, the way she was starting to love being kissed. Benny raised a hand to her cheek and sucked in a long breath as their mouths hungrily moved on each other. Beth decided she couldn’t wait another minute.

Reaching down to take him in her hand one last time, she lined him up with her entrance and sat up, still gripping his shoulders. 

Beth grew up detesting when people looked at her; the disapproving stares she’d get in her frumpy clothes. But not here, not with Benny. She was finding she loved to be watched by him. 

Bending her knees, she felt him push into her, inch by delicious inch. She couldn’t help the sound that caught in her throat, followed by the moan that escaped her lips as he sunk deeper inside. She took a moment to adjust to the stretch from the new angle. Then, as if by dormant instinct, she spread her knees to grind herself further down. 

“Can I -- can I touch you,” Benny grunted, his voice only partially cutting through the sound of blood pounding in her ears.

“Yes,” she breathed, moving off him almost completely just to press down again, finding her tempo. 

She felt Benny’s strong hands on her hips, empowering him to push up when she plunged down. Her thoughts scattered. Her eyes fluttered closed as she savored the feeling of his warmth inside and around her, the insistent squeak of the bed so far away. 

_More_ . Benny snapped his hips in time with her punishing pace. She was losing her rhythm, her momentum interrupted by her own impatience, her body laying claim to Benny’s without consulting her mind. He must have sensed her desperation because he relocated a hand to her center, his thumb stroking her assertively. Beth gasped at the heightened sensation and opened her eyes. Benny stared back with pupils blown wide, piercing through her, _into_ her. She felt his fingers dip down to where their bodies were joined to spread wetness further up. _Ah_. 

Pulsing, seismic shocks begin to take shape, a natural force of uncharted magnitude. She arched her back for relief and ground herself down, thighs stiff, while Benny thrust up with everything he had. 

The earth shook. Beth hung her head as waves of pleasure radiated out from her core to her shuddering extremities. Beth was suspended in that feeling, blissfully lost. Her nails dug into his shoulders deep enough to draw blood. Benny brought his arms around her back, holding her against him. He panted hot breaths against her neck. Then, with an unmistakable stutter of his hips and a long groan in her ear, at last they were still.

Beth fought to fill her lungs with air. She was shivering, but her body felt like it was overheating. Unconsciously she raised herself off of Benny for the last time, feeling hyper-sensitive and dazed. Benny let out a hiss through his teeth when she moved. Spent, Beth felt her legs give out as she tumbled to the bed next to him, elbows and knees colliding painfully. 

Benny huffed a laugh. “Nine out of ten, except for the dismount,” he said, still catching his breath. 

Beth scoffed and pretended to be offended. “So we’re keeping score now?” she said. 

Benny was looking at the ceiling, lost in thought, or perhaps cataloguing how she’d looked when she’d been there, moving on him. 

“I am,” he confirmed, turning to look at her with a grin. 

“Well, I’d better be winning,” Beth said, assessing a new soreness in her jaw. 

“Hmm, for now,” he conceded. 

Abruptly, Benny sat up. “Not giving myself a chance to botch this again,” he said, waving a hand lazily in her direction. He excused himself to the bathroom and shuffled off. Beth hid her smile in a pillow. 

When he returned, Beth had already made herself comfortable on what was fast becoming “her side of the bed”. Benny curled up behind her, weaving an arm around her waist and burying his nose in her hair. She scooched her hips back, aligning herself against him. Sleep would claim her soon.

“I could get used to this,” he pondered quietly. 

Beth said nothing, but she repeated his words in her head. Her thoughts began to oscillate between images of chess strategy, dark eyes, and airplane food. Of warm breath, dark trailers, and half-remembered dreams. Of her chess board on the ceiling, through a canopy and then next to Jolene. 

Benny started snoring softly in her ear, the sound instantly soothing her unfocused mind. And in those final moments of consciousness, Benny felt like home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo! So glad I was able to finish this (all thanks to your encouragement!). It's been rattling around my brain for the entire duration of my time off over Christmas. Watching the series again definitely helped. 
> 
> Please forgive me for lots of fluff in the first half of the chapter, I just want them to go on dates. A bagel date in the park where Benny can meet with his fans seemed fitting. 
> 
> Beth and Benny are still my ride or die, no one can convince me they're not great for each other. 
> 
> Please let me know what you thought! All feedback on this story has been hugely appreciated. Thank you!


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